Livaboard Captain Wisnioski's in Tierra Verde, Florida at the helm of his Pearson 365.

You have found your dreamboat. You lie awake at night dreaming of distant anchorages you hope to visit. Visions of clear blue water, miles of white sand and palm tree lined vistas fill your head. You excitedly indulge in thought to make changes to the boat, to make it "your" boat. Maybe a new GPS or stove or some other "got to" have gadget. You spend hours reading on-line articles and join web forums. You, my friend, are hooked, addicted, inextricably linked to the life of a sailor, and if you have not yet enjoyed a swig of rum, the Old Salts' drink, you assuredly will.

Quickly you will simulate with your new mistress and begin moving about your vessel as if you had done so all of your life. You have declared yourself Captain, the captain of your vessel. God help the heathen, non-nautical sap that steps aboard with out knowing stem from stern, port from starboard or the finer points of sail trim. Yes, you are the Captain; and as with most titles come a significant degree of responsibility. You are responsible for everything that happens aboard your ship. Thus captain you must be safe, you must have fun, and you must be kind.

Captain Bligh incognito, aka Doug Wisnioski

Very few of us will circumnavigate single-handed and even fewer of us Old Salts will venture more than a weekend away from our slip. So where does that leave us? Enjoying sailing when we can and where we can. We will probably spend more time sailing with friends aboard than not. The probability is high they will have little sailing knowledge. I have found that most folk's vision of sailing is one of tranquility. Escaping the high drama of everyday life for a chance to commune with nature, relax and enjoy. With that said, the last thing someone whose sole purpose is a relaxing sail, is to board a beautiful vessel only to be greeted by Captain Bligh himself.

I recently made a seven and a half day sail from Miami to St. Petersburg, Florida. I sailed with a friend that I have known for 10 years. I thought I knew him well. I was wrong. I expected a great deal more adaptability from him and soon found that my expectations were very much off the mark. He lost his brother two years previous while serving in Iraq. I knew the loss hurt him deeply and on the surface seemed to be handling it well. I was wrong; it had really taken its toll on my friend. My inability to identify the problem combined with, as some would say, my demanding personality was a recipe for disaster. I failed to know my crew and know their abilities… this was not kind.

Within the first hour of our trip, conflict was brewing. For example, only a few miles down the ICW in Miami, passing the Sunny Isles Bridge, I smelled something burning. I yelled for my crewmate to ready the anchor as I was going to shut down the engine and investigate the source of the smell. When I gave the command for anchors aweigh, he started to argue with me telling me I should move further out of the channel. Numerous other events like this occurred over the almost eight days. Although I do not advocate giving up your responsibility as captain for the sake of safety, I do recommend that if you expect to have any sailing friends, you follow the rule of "be kind".

Being kind has no limits, therefore giving us countless ways to show kindness. I like to start with familiarizing my guests with the boat accompanied by a 10-page PowerPoint presentation. Some would say that I have gone to extremes, but I think this technique does an important thing. It familiarizes them with particular areas of the boat, emphasizing the "dos and don'ts" and it is not coming from a know-it-all captain. Speaking of know-it-alls, have you ever been sailing with someone who gains pleasure by scaring the heck out of you by attempting to find that magical heeling spot somewhere between zero and 90 degrees that makes you want to scream for your mamma? Non-sailors or those with little experience live their lives on a relatively flat, non-moving surface. Putting them on a sailboat can be daunting enough, image leaning the boat over 30 degrees. For most, it is a very uncomfortable feeling. My recommendation is to take it slow. Pick a good weather day for taking beginners out, as they will appreciate it.

Keeping friends safe is an important aspect of a Captain's job. Although showing them where the beer is kept is a close second.

My next task is to explain all of the safety features on the boat, including the location of life vests, flares and their operation, signaling devices, first aid kit, the man-overboard procedure, and lastly how to call the Coast Guard in an emergency. After I have given the tour and explained the basic functions of the lines, sails, engine and initial operation of the boat, I like to ask my guests if they want a turn at the helm. Some folks will jump at the chance while others are shyer. I think it is important for visitors on your boat to take a crack at it. First, it gets them involved and makes them busy. This can be especially helpful if they are feeling a bit seasick. A turn at the helm can help to take their mind off their stomach. Second, God forbid that something should happen to yours truly, they would have at least some knowledge of how to take care of the boat until help arrives.

Next, I like to show my guests the amenities on the boat. Finding a cold beer and how to turn on the latest Buffet CD are paramount. Another important task is explaining the operation of the head. For some reason, this long revered and often cursed bit of marine equipment is overwhelming for most landlubbers. Take a few moments to describe its operation. It will save hours of frustration as you try to fish something out of your head that should have never gone in.

Your visiting crew may not have been much help when you left the dock due to their novice standing however, you will most likely need their help coming back into the slip. I think that this is one of the tasks similar to the man overboard drills that you should rehearse. Start by assigning your guests a duty position and function for coming into the dock. Whether it is line handling or fending off, make certain your guests fully understand their responsibilities. This technique will save you embarrassment from you dock mates, hopefully prevent damage to your vessel as well as others and most importantly keep your guest from getting hurt.

Next time you are out sailing with guests, take a moment and view the experience from their eyes. You mustn't forget, you were new to sailing once upon a time. Remember it is up to you Captain; keep it safe, keep it fun and keep it kind.